Labor Day Weekend Adventures

Labor Day weekend was special because it presented us with two whole days to study, instead of the normal one (normally Saturday, because we try not to study on Sundays). Imagine our excitement! Two whole days of research and writing for Dan on the Patriot Act and for me on 1st/14th Amendment. *sarcastic grin*

Given the delights awaiting us on Saturday and Monday, we were even more excited about our planned excursion to the coast on Sunday. :) We skipped church (heathens that we are) to get an early start and then took our time on the drive, stopping every time one of us saw something interesting. This was alternatively a positive experience (for example, when we stopped at Dutch Bros. Coffee, which we'd never tried before) or a negative one (like the roadside junk stand selling $850 carved wooden bears--who pays that much for a wooden bear, anyway?).

We had elected to go to a "new" section of the coast--typically our "stompin' grounds" include only the northern coastal towns--and drove the extra 45 minutes or so down to Newport: home of what I have decided is the cheesiest "historical bayfront" in the world. The place is supposedly a great tourist attraction, with billboards all over the city promising dazzling feats during the dive show at the Undersea Gardens, or amazing thrills at "Ripley's Believe it or Not" (which I think was supposed to be some kind of museum of the strange, the weird and the just plain gross--thankfully I never found out for sure). We decided to check out the Undersea Gardens, which from the dock looked simply like an old, run-down boat that hadn't been moved in a very long time. I would've happily foregone the "dive show" altogether, but Dan really wanted to see the scuba diver with the big red octopus they advertised on all the billboards. We should've known: they charge $8.95 just to get in the place, so you won't know how badly you're being taken advantage of until after you've already paid. After shelling out our $17.90 we descended a dark, slippery stairway into the the foul-smelling, dimly-lit "hold" of this "ship" (which by the way, was all of maybe 30' by 10'). Porthole-sized windows lined the boat's walls, affording a poor view of a few forlorn-looking fish in hideously green water. The "dive show" was to take place at the far end of the boat, where there were three or four carpet-covered bleachers facing one section of the windows. Cheezy whale or dolphin music had been playing from somewhere for what seemed like a long time when the "narrator" finally showed up and introduced "Will"--a guy in a scuba suit who did actually jump into that horrid water from some place up above. Dan never did get to see his red octopus--"Will" danced a poor crab around by its pinchers for a few minutes, put a large starfish on his head like hair, and fed some dead fish to the almost-dead fish living in the tank. Then the "dive show" was over.

We would have been upset about being cheated out of $17.90, but we were too busy laughing at ourselves for being such suckers. The funniest thing was that on the way back up the dark staircase, there was a sign that said "If you liked the Undersea Gardens, you'll love Ripley's Believe it or Not and the Wax Works!" I'm not sure that advertisement truly maximizes the marketing potential of the attraction. . . it only convinced us that we'd hate the Wax Works and "Believe it or Not" as much as we hated the Undersea Gardens. Maybe they should put, "The Wax Works is way better! We promise! We'll give you your money back for this lousy show if you come see Wax Works. . . Please, we're begging. . ."

Moral of the story: If you ever find yourself in Newport, Oregon, steer clear of the Bayfront!

Anyway, in spite of that disaster, the rest of the day and the evening were lovely. We got to watch the sun set over the Pacific, which I never tire of (being an east coast girl, sunsets over water were hard to come by). After that I had the most amazing raspberry chai at this little coffee shop *wink*, and then we had dinner in a restaurant overlooking the beach, which was mostly dark, save for the few bonfires that dotted it here and there. I truly do love the Oregon coast, even though it'll never be as nice as the beaches at home (when it comes to weather and warmth, there's just no contest). As long as one doesn't intend to get in the water, it's a wonderful place to spend the weekend. *grin*